Two Women

"Both of us, respectfully accepting each other’s individuality and silently admitting our restricted roles in each other’s life..."

It’s beautiful the way I see it-

Two women. Born in different timelines of a Century. In different families. They lived under different circumstances and yet same society. They didn't know each other until they met for the first time. After this meeting, their lives changed but got connected. This was me and my mother.

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I am not sure but quite confident that the old ill-tempered I will be back soon (I already hear the foot-steps) and I’ll have to spend the rest of days with this grumpy woman inside me.

Mom is set to go back to India soon, leaving me loved, taken care of and fatter. I have not let her pack the luggage yet. The same I, who had been forcing her to pack her bags a month before she had to arrive.

Not that I am not used to staying alone or that staying secluded has been my nature. But that my emotional organs have comfortably become numb in the past few years.

Not that I am scared to stay alone but that I will miss her. I’ll miss the fragrant kitchen. I’ll miss being asked “what do you want to eat today”. I’ll miss my wardrobe full of colorful Indian dresses. I’ll miss getting up and seeing same pair of eyes, lips and same sound of snoring. So, it is not back to square one in my case. Certainly not.

I had discussed the natural emotions of attachment, bondage with my meditation teacher much before I was to get into this but his reply was beautiful- “Stay real. It’s your mother’s pure love. There is not an inch of falsity in it. Feel it without restricting yourself”. And I allowed myself to enjoy every moment of it.

And, there is a shift. The point that I have hinted before…

I was not the daughtery daughter this time. Yeah. And she wasn’t the motherly mother as she always has been. Both of us, respectfully accepting each other’s individuality and silently admitting our restricted roles in each other’s life.

She did what she has never done- ask (not force) me about the decisions I had made about my life. And, I did with her what I had never done- to force (not ask) her to turn of Facebook/YouTube and sleep :) 

As usual Richard Bach’s words become the most appropriate – “We were two boats met mid-ocean, each changing course to sail for a while in the same direction over an empty sea. Different boats on our way to different ports, and we knew it.”

P.S.  Mom has no access to my blogs